Archive | 5:55 pm

Running Tights… Tight Tights.

24 Oct

I see this ad for CW-X running tights in Runners World – and I think, “Those are soooo fancy, and I would love to have a pair.”  After a couple of months of stalking them on eBay I find a pair that isn’t too expensive… so BAM! they are mine!

I furiously open the package when they arrive, and to my shock and dismay, they look like something that my niece Kayla could wear.  At this point, Shiloh doubles over with fits of laughter.  “HAHAHAHA did you get the little kids size??  HAHAH”  “NO Damnit!!  but I am not sure what I am going to do with these…”

So, I do what any sensible gal would do – take them into the bathroom and lock the door.  Okay… Step one… pretend they are nylons….  They are a whole lot thicker than nylons – stttttttretch!!!!!!!  Okay, one leg on.  Try not to tip over, whoa, whoa, ouch.  Catch my breath.  stttttttretch – other leg on.  Now, shimmy to the left, shimmy to the right, yankin’ on these tights with all of my might!!!  One last big breath, and PULLLLLL, (at this point I am feeling like Molly Shannon on her SNL skit, “kick, stretch, kick – I’m 50!!”  But I got them on.

Holy Moses, these bad boys are like a second skin!!  I checked the package again, and yes, I ordered the right size.

I take them to the church to run, of course I am wearing shorts over them, I don’t need to be obscene about things.  Hey, these are pretty great.  They are really tight around the knee to provide some stabilization.  They force you to kick a little faster.  They are pretty warm. Did I mention they were fancy???

So, after my initial trauma – I think I could get used to them.  Although taking them off could provide for a whole new fight…  and lets just hope they don’t shrink in the wash.  I have zero wiggle room.

Until next time,