Would the voice in my head kindly… shut up!!!

23 Aug

I think Jen Lancaster says it best, “I’ve become obsessed with my size, and in doing so I’ve inadvertently allowed my inner critic to have a voice.  And you know what? She’s a bitch.  Like now when I see my underpants in the laundry, I no longer think Soft! Cotton! Sensible! Instead I hear her say Damn, girl, these panties be huge.”

The “voice in the head” can be a huge hurdle to overcome – with anything.  That is, if you don’t shut it up.  I was recently at a camp – when the leader pointed out – what would you do if you had a friend that said to you everything that voice in the head said.  Well I, for one, would karate chop them in the neck!  Along with a verbal lashing that would scar them for life. (because to be very honest… all bark, no bite – but don’t test my shunning ability, I will win)

I haven’t done much the last two, alright three, weeks due to an injury with my foot. (except for that little hiking venture, and my foot was the least of my worries).  And because of this my little voice says, “you’re fat, you look like hell, have you seen yourself lately, you shouldn’t have eaten that, wow – ice cream twice in one week – tisk, tisk, your pants are too tight, ew that shirt looks gross on you, is that a double chin I see,” and on and on and on and on.  Yeah, yeah – I know she is a raging asshat.  Finally, I give up – I admit defeat, and just go to bed. (After sneaking a couple bites of caramel sauce – but don’t tell Shiloh… he doesn’t know we have any.  So, zip it!)

So, while my confidence is shaken – it isn’t broken, and I am about to get it back.  Don’t worry, I won’t go all “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me,” on ya.  But I need to do something to get my swagga back.

My foot has healed – so I think once I get back into the swing of things all will be well.

Until then voice…  well, don’t make me release the flying monkeys.


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